AMBIGUOUS English SENTENCES Venkatachalam Salem

Double meaning English words

Did I read that sign right?

Alias title :

 'AMBIGUOUS SENTENCES AND
"BAD ENGLISH " JOKES'

1) In an office:

*WOULD THE PERSON WHO TOOK THE STEP LADDER YESTERDAY PLEASE BRING IT BACK OR FURTHER STEPS WILL BE TAKEN*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

Here "further steps" is an idiom that means "serious action will be taken" against the person. The word "step" is also in the missing "STEP LADDER"

2) In a London department store:
*BARGAIN BASEMENT UPSTAIRS*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

THEY FORGOT THAT "basement" IS THE NAME OF A FLOOR UNDER A BUILDING AND IT CAN'T BE ANYWHERE ELSE INCLUDING  "UPSTAIRS".

3) In an office:

*AFTER TEA BREAK STAFF SHOULD EMPTY THE TEAPOT AND STAND UPSIDE DOWN ON THE DRAINING BOARD*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

 "KEEP THE TEA POT UPSIDE DOWN...   .... ".
It seems to suggest that the person who used it should stand "underside down".

4) Outside a secondhand shop:

*WE EXCHANGE ANYTHING - BICYCLES, WASHING MACHINES, ETC. WHY NOT BRING YOUR WIFE ALONG AND GET A WONDERFUL BARGAIN?*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

They wanted to say that your wife will be a better person than you to decide things. But the sentences also "wrongly" communicates that YOU MAY EVEN EXCHANGE "YOUR OLD WIFE" AND GET A NEW WIFE.

5) Notice in health food shop window:
*CLOSED DUE TO ILLNESS*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

The person operating the shop is suffering from illness. It suggest that the "shop itself" is "ILL".

6) Spotted in a safari park:
*ELEPHANTS PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

ELEPHANTS are outside so you PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR. But it seems to be an instruction "to elephants" and not to human beings.

Just adding a comma after first word "ELEPHANTS" will also make the sentence correct. Like ..

*ELEPHANTS, PLEASE STAY IN YOUR CAR*

 7) Notice in a farmer's field:

*THE FARMER ALLOWS WALKERS TO CROSS THE FIELD FOR FREE, BUT THE BULL CHARGES*.

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

On the surface the meaning seems to be that human beings can cross the field "free of cost", but bulls will be "charged" a fee.

But actually they wanted to say that there is a bull in the field and it will attack you. Here "Bull charges" means "bull will attack you".

8) On a repair shop door:

*WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

It is a "Contradiction'. They claim that they can repair "anything". But they seem to be unfit or dubious persons because their door bell itself is at fault and it is in a "unrepaired" state.

9) In an office:

*TOILET OUT OF ORDER...... PLEASE USE FLOOR BELOW*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

Please use the TOILET in the floor below and not to use the "FLOOR" AS YOUR TOILET.

11) In a Laundromat:

*AUTOMATIC WASHING MACHINES: PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHES WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT*

(*) They wanted to actually say .. 😄

IT IS AN INSTRUCTION TO REMOVE THE "WASHED CLOTHES" FROM THE MACHINE. AND THE LIGHT MENTIONED HERE IS THE LIGHT IN THE MACHINE. BUT IT IS OF COURSE AMBIGUOUS.

We all need a good laugh, keep on smiling.?
😄😄

Thanks to

GUNASEKAR HCMS78

"They wanted to actually say ... COMMENTS INTRODUCED"

by

Ezhilarasan Venkatachalam
Global Tamil Based English Trainer
Salem.